Vestpod - Emilie Bellet, Women and Money

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The truth about financial dependence šŸ’šŸ’šŸ’³

It looks like weā€™re on a roll with awkward, touchy topics this week. Next up: the double-edged-sword that is being financially dependent on your spouse. Whatever your reasons - and Iā€™m sure you have plenty - itā€™s important to know how to protect yourself in case things arenā€™t as smooth-sailing as youā€™d hope.
 

Thereā€™s no way to say this nicely, so weā€™re going to hand it to you shaken, not stirred: leaving the workforce to be a stay-at-home wife or mum is a huge risk. While thereā€™s absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying this role, itā€™s important you are fully aware of the gamble you take on as a dependent spouse. We donā€™t want to be all doom and gloom here, but your marriage could collapse, your spouse could be made redundant and you both could land tonne of debt as a result. Add kids to the picture, and youā€™re facing very bitter and painful conundrum. So, while these are worst-case scenarios, itā€™s vital you remain clear-eyed and protect yourself against any downfalls. Hereā€™s our top tips:
 

  • Give freelancing or flexible work a try. Women often leave their jobs to take care of the kids - and as the cost of childcare continues to soar, itā€™s hardly a surprise that so many choose this route. If youā€™re a stay at home mum, perhaps itā€™s time to think outside the box. Look for ways to make a little extra money on the side, when the kids are at nursery or school (or napping). Thereā€™s plenty of options, from freelance consultancy, to writing to photography and even starting your own business. If you have income that is yours and yours only, youā€™ll feel less burdened if things between you and your spouse go south.
  • Keep your skills up-to-date. Take an online course. Learn a new language. Heck, do another Masterā€™s degree - keeping your skills up-to-date will not only be an enriching experience for you on a personal level, but itā€™ll serve as an invaluable back-up should you need to go back to the workforce.
  • Have a prenup. Even if youā€™re a die-hard romantic, you canā€™t deny the importance of a prenup agreement. If worse comes to worst, and you decide to go your separate ways, a prenup will help ease what will surely already be a painful and complicated time.
  • Know your rights. Knowledge is power, especially when youā€™re a financially dependent spouse. It isnā€™t unromantic or cynical to think about what would happen if things donā€™t work out - itā€™s smart. Imagine: you spend fifteen years raising three children, supporting your partner through and through in their career, only to have them turn their back on you. Cue heartbreak, stress, devastation and chaos. Who gets the kids? What about the money? Do they really get to keep the house? Consulting a lawyer even before youā€™re officially married can be the smartest investment you make, so donā€™t shy away from professional advice.

Credit photo: Giphy.